Tuesday, April 24, 2012

He's so Shy. AkA . Day of Hell

As I sit here listening to The Pointer Sister's "He's so shy" I reflect on this WTF day.  Please look up this ancient song and listen whilst I rant about our awesome day.  Check out these lovely pictures of a bouncing red ball while we go down the day of hell memory lane.  

Wow,  you guys are cute.  

It all started this morning with a call from an Office Manager stating,

"Hello Jen.  Did you hear about this morning's drama?"  This was done in the voice of the newscaster on Sesame Street.  You know the one.
He goes on to tell me that the shop assistant was not helpful this morning and they were packed.  He went on to say the S.A said, "Is it going to be one of those days where I have to hold your hand?"  Did I mention that this was said in front a customer?  All sassifrassy.  Rad.  He is a bad ass.  He was told to go home for the day.  Did he?  Why no young ones.  He drove himself over to the Mesa shop to work.  Rad again.  ( I just turned the Pointer Sister's up to full blast.)  When I called him to discuss the happenings our conversation was so unbelievable that my pants are still wet from the soaking my slacks took during the call (as in wet my pantalones from laughing / frustration / trying not to yell):

He said a..hole and di.. and other words that I can't spell  - - so many times I couldn't keep track.  Twas rad.  ( typing and saying rad today might be a coping mechanism)  He also told me that if someone is a jack...  is going to disrespect him he will treat him poorly right back.  He's worked in the construction industry before and that is how it works.  Word.  (I added that)  He also said he said the hand holding thing and didn't understand why it was a big deal since the Office Manager was being such a d...!  

I addressed it with a numbered system 

1.  First off so and so,  I own the company and yet you speak to me this way.  What makes you think you can say these words to me?

 - - he tried to interrupt.  Me. "Oh no sweetie.  I am talking now.  You will listen."  He tried to interrupt after every number below.

You don't get to use a potty mouth with the your employer,  soon to be previous employer.  Learn some manners son.  Yeah,  I said it.

2.   If you notice that the Office Manager is swamped then you step up to help and don't sass him, especially in front of customer.   People get frustrated all of the time.  You don't just act like a child just because someone that you work with is frazzled.  Employees should back each other up.

3.  This is not a construction company.  

4.  You are immature.  I mean it.  (you kept interrupting about how he had it out for you and complained about how you were mopping.  You felt nit picked and like he had it out for you.)  Get the freak over it.  Listen, improve, and move on.  Did you ever think maybe his suggestion in the mopping arena might be useful / helpful?   Are you so "disrespected" over the mopping dis that you can't even open up your dos ojos to the fact that you aren't perfect.  

(On a side note.  This is a common thread.  The "He doesn't tell me how much he loves me enough"  I need to interview people's parents and see who's parents did a good job at building their child's self esteem b/c this shit is getting old.  Get it together parents.  Seriously,  get some parenting skillz )

5.  You are just not getting it

6   You are not a good fit for our company.  You are done.  Your check will be mailed.  

We had Ella over today while all of this was going on.  You, Ava, and Miss. Ella were awesome and let me have my "work time".  We then headed off to Sonic prior to our visit to Dr.  Morris for some HillBilly Tooth time.  Yes, Miss.  A your filling on your front tooth - what what- I said it.  Your freaking front tooth had a filling and then lost it.  We are super Ghetto up in here.  As you are laying back on the denti table my phone rings.  SCHOOL NURSE.  Not kidding.  Rad.  I answer

SCHOOL NURSE. "Mrs.  Babbitt Paige just passed out in class.  Can you please come and pick her up?"

WTF.  Seriously RAD!!!!  No,  it turns out I can't get her immediately.   You, Ava,  are on the denti table and I am 30 minutes away.  I call everyone I know.  
A.  They don't answer  - HOT Fing DAMN
B.  They are super far away -  HoTTTT DAMN

I think that little immature turd wore off on me and I now have permanent disrespect your boss potty mouth.

I end up getting a hold of Holly Sato.  (Her husband is our accountant)  She picks up Paige.  Hangs with her for 30 minutes until the other kids get out of school.   Holly will be getting a super uber awesome present.  

Did I mention that just before the Dr.  Mo walked in I received a call from the Office Manager who informed me that he received a text from the fired employee stating,

"What goes around comes right back around."

When I called him to confront him he laughed and said he didn't mean it as a threat.  He just said, "Karma."  I advised him to cool off and grow up.  I really don't think he has it in him.  I then called Matt (one of our many awesome Lawyer friends)  He gave me some rad advice.  

As I am writing this you,  Paige, threw up.  I just had Kristen call the school nurse and she called me.  LOVE.  No, Paige did not hit her head during her swan dive.  Phew.  I told you that I think you are about to get your period and you told me to shut it.  I think that non-perv people should say period more often to reduce the stigma.  The problem is when nosy pervy people say it;  they ruin it for everyone.  Damn the nosy pervy people.  

Today might be the large bottle of wine day.  I'll have dad post a picture of me passed out on my yoga mat tonight.  Drunk yoga is going to be epic.  Dios mio.  I am thankful that everyone is alive and I have stamina like a bull.   I am also thankful for Kristen and Matt Long who came to my aid in differing day of hell issues.  I am also thankful to Holly Sato.  She has angel wings and drives a minivan.  

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