Friday, July 31, 2009

teeth

Dear Captain,

Yesterday you called me and told me that you forgot your "teeth". This is one of those - "You know your memory is bad when....."

How the crap did you forget your teeth. You have a GIANT, gaping, smelly hole in the front of your mouth. It is not like you are 80 years old or something; you are 37---get a grip.

You came home around 2pm to get your teeth. Apparently you have a lisp when they are not in your mouth. Some of your customers found this endearing. Ohhh.

I am still in shock by your phone call. Did I mention that you tried to put the blame on me for putting your "teeth" in the retainer case. Super cute old man, but it is not going to fly.

Love,

Your clean, totally tooth friendly, wife

Sunday, July 26, 2009

The Weekend


#4,  You were really into chucking sand.  The funny part is you kept rubbing your mouth (with your sandy hands)  over and over.  It was like the lesson didn't quite click.  You would rub the sand in your mouth, realize that you didn't like sand in your mouth, and then rub your tongue all over whatever I was wearing.  

This was a baby jellyfish that #3 found.  It was truly amazing.  The picture does not do it justice.  We were super afraid of touching it.  All of the sudden a little girl walked over to #3's cup and picked up the jellyfish on her finger.  She was speaking rapid Spanish to us???  We were like doesn't that hurt.  She was all "es muy bonita.  Mira."  



The chicken shack.  #4 loved playing with the birds.  The Captain stuffed himself with chicken and beans for 3 days.  We are all living with the aftermath.  My nose is so disturbed and mind you it is broken.
The was how we spent every morning.  

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Question

Uncle Danny just asked me how much Nair Nathan uses on his body and back.  I was like what is Nair.  
he says, " you know the stuff to remove hair."
  I say, "Nathan doesn't remove the hair on his body."

he says, " he has to.  His hair is so smooth and he doesn't have hair on his back."

I say, "No, he doesn't have hair on his back."


Several things come to mind.  Nair must have been extremely popular right before Danny's accident.  He tends to like things that were dominating the media back then.  
1. Karate Kid
2. Fresh Prince of Bell Air
3.  Cops
4. Richard Marks
5.  Nair

Secondly, I always wondered why he stared at Nathan so much.  Turns out he was checking out his hair population.  

he says, "He just doesn't want you to know.  I tell you he uses Nair."

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Drop it like it's hot

It was a warm day....116.  Dad is always super creative when it comes to having fun without spending a lot of money.  Thus we welcomed rubbermaid, the mop bucket, and a large drinking cooler.  I feel like the Dukes of Hazzard music should be playing while I write this.  Actually it should be some accordian Mexican music as a salute to Nates childhood.   When you grow up playing with a stick and a rock rubbermaid is a huge step up.  Do you know what he could have done with these buckets?  I can't fathom.  


To Floss or not to floss

Dear #2,


After our fab day it was time for some dental care.  He are a few pics of everyone flossing.  




Laundry Fort

You and #3 played in the laundry room for about 5 hours last week.  The reason?  The crockpot was in there.  You two informed me that it was smelling so good and wanted to be near it.  

Friday, July 17, 2009

Dental Day

So today was dental surgery day for The Captain.    The goal was implants.  Unfortunately, the bone needed some grafting thus no implants yet.  Here is the super part.  I walk into the recovery room and my husband is texting.  I try to grab the phone to no avail.  He has cotton in his mouth and is mumbling to me.  He asks to see the doctor.  I ask why and he says he doesn't know.  

Dr. Kelly comes over and explains the bone graft.  He says that parts of the bone will make their way up through the cut and it will feel like chewing on sand.  Awesome - what else?  Oh, how about the fact that is dead person bone.  Cool!

We start to walk out to the car.  I have Nate on one side and James (worker) has the other.  At this point I say,

"hey, no going down on me."

James snickers.  Okay, I get it.  I meant fainting James.  

I start the 25minute ride home.  He is still texting.  He turns to me 10minutes into the drive and asks me if I talked to the doctor.  I say yes and so did you.  He looks irritated.  I explain what Dr. Kelly said....again.  He then asks me what he has been texting.  I try to take his phone away again......didn't happen.  

I drop off the perscriptions.  He asks me what the doctor said again.  He then tells me that he is feeling better and expects to go back to work in an hour.  Awesome,  I can't get enough crazy medicine talk.

I just got the phone.  I checked out the texting.  He told his friends (after just waking up from being under)  that he had an implant put in. Not any ordinary implant.  Think Austin Powers.   What the Crap.  The phone is now in the safe.  Holy moly

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

DO NOT FORGET THIS RECIPE

Hey there you, 


Sautee

2 tomatoes - diced
2 onions (these were the tiny ones from the garden) diced
1 clove of garlic diced
throw in 1/2 a bag of baby spinach
chop up 1/2 a radichio (sp)
sautee with olive oil for 5minutes

Add 1 cup of cream vodka tomato sauce from Fresh and Easy 
1/4 cup heavy cream

Cook on med and low for the next 5 min.

Cook the pasta

Add 2 tblspoons goat cheese - grate some parm cheese

Add the sauce.  Holy moly.  #1 had 2 helpings and Uncle Danny had 3.




What????

So I was washing your bedding the other day.  This was due to the fact that you REFUSE to wear a pull-up.  I sneak into your room after you are asleep and put one on you.  Needless to say I fell asleep before this occurred on this particular day.  I tell you I swear by the waterproof mattress pad.  AMEN.



So there is a BMW shop that opened with some guys that Nate used to work with at the Dealer. Heavens knows but they decided to open their shop 3 miles away from us. Then they decided to do everything that we do as it pertains to

1. Web placement
2. Advertising
3. Card distribution
4. Sales techniques
5. You name it -- within a few days of us trying something new ----guess what---- they are trying it to.
6. Weirdly enough they even have the same insurance agent as me.

So today as we were driving home from math tutoring what do we see? Their car. Super funny. It is similar in color and style to mine, but not a BMW. It has the huge company logo on the back window like mine. Here is the conversation that ensues:

#1, "mom do you know any place that makes bumper stickers."

Mom, " I am sure there are a ton of places. You would just look it up on the Internet."

#1, " I think we should get a bumper sticker made that says, "hey I can't come up with my own ideas. I like to copy Babbitt Motor Werks."


So I think this is hilarious on so many levels. This is the extent of how CRAZY the Babbitts can get. No we won't egg or key your car.....................we will put a bumper sticker on it that shows how you can't brainstorm. (Bumper stickers can be removed y'all.) He was very calm and precise when having this conversation with me. It was more annoyance vs. anger. I am super curious to see how you handle difficult situations in the future!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Discussion

We were in the car today discussing the usual stuff----------addiction, squeezing, diabetes, and hemophilia.  SERIOUSLY.

So it was Me, #2, #3, and #4.  I was talking about who they should make some cards for.  We were discussing Dan Parr.  I forgot to mention his diabetes.  #2 remembered.  Which then lead to multiple questions from #3 about organs and what Dan looks like.  #2 delved right into her knowledge of diabetes with a wee bit of inaccurate information.  Like the fact that if he cuts himself he will NEVER stop bleeding.  

This lead me to another thought process.  Why the heck was there so much taught about hemophilia in school?  I remember an abnormal amount of time spent learning about this RARE disease.  I used to have phobias about cutting myself and not healing.  (Wait -----maybe this is where my passing out from the site of blood comes from.)  Why were there so many actors enlisted to play in the educational movies depicting blood problems?  I distinctly remember biology in jr high AND high school and the movies that we watched.  I know I am old now, but I wonder if this craziness is still going on or if the focus is now on diseases that affect .....let's say 1 in 3 people.  


Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Beyonce

Last night was the Beyonce concert. So I like her music, but would never have purchased tickets. Since Kim called and had some I was like, "of course.......let's go crazy and go see Ms. B" April Haymore went with and so did Kim's relatives.

May I say that this was the best concert I have ever been to. (I have been to a vast array of concerts. In this category I am not counting school band concerts. The weirdest concert was Chris Issac - he changed his clothes more than Beyonce. What was up with his Three Amigos getups? Really Chris put down the bedazzeler) It was like an art show for my eyes. She was stunning, the videos were amazing, and the dancing was perfect. I kept looking at April and saying "my eyes are sooo happy right now."

Several things that I observed or occured at the event:

1. Beyonce's gay following rivals Kathy Griffin
2. People smell really bad at concerts. (I don't have a sense of smell and was still able to get an idea of how bad it was. When walking out of the concert I turned around and April (who's nose is bear quality) was puking in her mouth. She had that look in her eyes like the chics in horror movies when they see the killer making their move to stab them.)
3. Getting lost in down town Phoenix at 11:30pm is a wee bit scary.
4. LASTLY, my booty is not very big. I am going to really put an effort into enhancing my trunk this week.








Sunday, July 5, 2009

Ducks

We went to the Ranch this weekend. As always it is such a lovely time. The room that the Captain and I stay in is decorated so fancy. Ralph Lauren bedding, plaid wallpaper, and 4 cute pictures of some wild ducks. (by the way I had to come to a complete stop in the road when a wild turkey decided to stand in front of my car. Whatever.)

Back to the ducks. We are sitting on the bed this morning. Nate says,
" do you know why people have pictures of ducks?"

I say, "no. duh."

He says,
"I think it is because they are so yummy. Look at what a great piece of meat they are. Man, this is making me hungry."

Okay, so sometimes I can get a sense of the direction that he may be going with an idea. I must say that I had NO IDEA that he was going with the ducks look yummy line of thinking.

A couple of hours later he found a People magazine. I hear,

"hey do you know why kids like the Jonas brothers so much? I think it is because they look yummy like ducks."


Mind you he is laughing his bum off but still can't keep his mind off of eating duck. Really Nate, you have lived in the United States for awhile now. Get with it. Stop with the thinking of eating of the weird animals. Rabbitts are meant to run around the yard; stop stalking them. We WILL NOT EAT THEM.