Monday, July 29, 2013

Pebt (I've combined debt with your name darling)

It seems like all you talk and think about is shopping - Paige.  All four of you have had savings accounts, but 2 weeks ago I set up checking accounts with debit cards for you, P, and your brother.  You both are amazing babysitters and have earned a substantial fortune this summer.  Typically you aren't allowed to spend your money, but we switched things up a bit and boy am I glad.

I am already seeing you fall flat on your debit card face and you are only 13.  Lovely.  Let us rejoice in the failing that is restraint now before you have to be responsible.  

So you went out shopping thrice this week and boy was it interesting.  One time with me, one time with Allie, and one time with Rachel.  When I dropped Allie back at her house after your epic spending day you were quite chatty.  I asked you what Allie had been up to all summer and here is the rest of our convo

Pebt, "Oh, I didn't think to ask her."

Mom, " Did Allie get a chance to speak at all?"

Pebt, "See there are people who just like to listen.  She is one of them.  I think she really just enjoyed listening to me talk the whole time.  She did speak some, but I can speak for the both of us."

Mom, "Damn."

I asked you to keep a tally of what you are spending when you heading off for the 1st trip.  You said, "No." This is totally going to be fun.  Yippee!  Love it.  Rad.

Third trip you called and said you thought you had $12 left on your card, but weren't really sure.  I advised you that you can not go below the $25 balance line.  You said, "WHAT? REALLY?"  This is super RAD!

Monday, July 22, 2013

Date night

Paige, your siblings were all gone tonight so dad and I took you and your lovely friend Rachel out to dinner and shopping.  We ate some glorious food at Olive and Ivy.  You thought bolognese sauce meant there was bologna in it.  Love it.  I have a suspicion that your father may have an alien inhabiting his body right now.  He ordered flat bread, turned to me, and asked if he should get salami or sausage on it.  
1.  He hates them both
2.  He decided on getting salami on 1/2 and sausage on 1/2

Now, I am all for both of those meat products, but your father has always been so vehemently against them.  Kind of like how I would march for vagina rights; tu'padre has marched against the Italian sausage and salami industry.  I really don't know what is happening.

After dinner we did a wee bit of shopping.  After shopping we had to seek out a Dunkin Donuts.  Gahhh it wasn't good, but you loved it.  

Whilst seeking out the donuts we listened to a bunch of different songs.  All of said songs were in the top 40 since that is the extent of your musical taste.  After we dropped Rachel off at her home you asked me to put on some rap music so you could be a gangster.  You informed us two important facts:

1.  Rap is poetry that is mean, "Get in the club, bottoms up, bottoms up." (that was your rap to show us it is mean.  You actually rapped in a low voice.  It wasn't too bad.  I also informed you that there is plenty of rap poetry that is kind and good.  Macklemore's song about acceptance. )
2. You would like to form a superhero gang that helps people. 

Monday, July 15, 2013

Inside a Ginger's sassy brain

Yesterday was a lovely floating pool day for you and I, Miss. A.  I was on my lounge floater and you were on the step playing and asking me a million questions.

A, "Why are we not on vacation?"

I answered that we are busy working this summer and we will be going to Mexico with Ella's family in October.

A, "WHAT???? Will it be on my birthday because my birthday is in October so it could be on my birthday are we flying there or driving there (inhale - it was all said in one breath)"

Me, " We are driving on this trip; but you need to know that we will be flying when we go to the Mexican Riviera next year.  Now I don't know if you knew this or not, but I used to work for an airplane company.  Dad and I used to fly all over the place and we are here and just fine."

Can I interrupt this lovely conversation to say that I tried the "We need to not be scared of death, we will all eventually die." line of thought last week to no avail.

A, "You also used to drive boats all of the time and you made a boat accident happen when we were in the boat.  Boats look fun when you are not in them and when you are in them it is not very fun.  You are a really bad boat driver."

WHAT?????  I wasn't even driving that stinking boat, we were on a freaking trailer.  How the hell am I owning your dad's boating mistake.  Damn it- -  I thought your future therapy would be attended by tu' father and now to find out it will be me.  AHHHHH. 

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Paige has a sad epiphany

So you went with me to work the other day and we were driving to pick up a part.  As we were driving we passed a place with the name Cabaret in the title.  You turned to me and asked me what it was.  I explained that Cabaret is a fancy way of saying, "Ladies take their clothes off here and men pay them to do it."

Your response,

"Ahhh I thought that only happened in bad states.  This happens here in Arizona?"


"Yes, and there are about 6 of them near the Scottsdale shop."


"Are you serious.  On purpose?"

This makes me want to throw up all over my new shoes (which by the way are super cute).  I just read a great article by Stephanie Lauritzen in the Salt Lake City Weekly.

She Wrote:

 The notion that men are animals and cannot control their responses to visual stimuli creates a culture of rape apologists. 

 ...the idea that women are only “dignified” when wearing certain clothes also teaches girls and women that their bodies are objects—scary objects, used to torment men. 

...the real solution doesn’t lie in a one-piece. It lies in seeing both men and women as people, not objects or animals. Instead of criminalizing men by insisting that “real men” need modest women in order to behave, we need to expand the definition of masculinity and what “real men” are capable of in terms of human decency. 

She is Quite lovely don't you think - Paige?  Sorry you had to awaken to this shit.  I will try to fight the crazies who call it normal.  Don't ever lose your initial reaction to this, do not get numb and think it is normal,to make money from men looking at your boobies.  Okay, I'm going to go run 2 miles in 115 degree weather -this is depressing - I'm out. 

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Date Night

Twas your date night, little A.  You thought about this for 2 days straight; never wanting to commit to a place because you might change your mind.  Most of those 2 days you thought you would want McDonalds.  

No, I'm not kidding.  I know, I know I'm soooo funny.  Shut it - I'm serious.  McDonalds.  Yes, I deprive you of shit food during your childhood, so when you can get your hands on it you shove it in your boca.  Crazy true. (on a side note look how handsome your father is with glasses- ahhh)  Anyways we convinced you to pick Nordstroms cafe instead, with a stop at McDonalds for an icecream cone after.

You picked out 2 stuffed kittens at Nordstroms and named them "Wanda" and "Fun Guy"

When we got home your brother used a stern voice with you and you took it to heart.  Here is you after balling your eyes out.


Grace and Ava came into town this past weekend.  We swam and went to see Despicable Me.  This pic (above) looks like a really bad senior prom pic.

Girlz night pics