Sunday, January 31, 2010

A Lovely picture of Uncle Danny at his BEST!!

On the ride home yesterday Uncle Danny started sporting this lovely piece of old ribbon (that I had used on his Christmas present) around his head. The reasoning..........

"Babies wear them on their bald heads and it makes their heads look better."

I must say I didn't expect this reasoning. Who knew he watches ALL humans with bald heads to determine methods for casting the shinny skin in the best light. I really didn't think that infants were included in the pool of hairless candidates. It is EXTREMELY interesting that he thinks a "headband" is applicable for his head because he saw some on baby.....................................girls.


So, Numero quatro.

You just entered our room (You were supposed to be in bed!!!) and you requested that your dad put on his bunny pajamas to match yours. (Yes, your dad owns footed rabbit pajamas- duh)

I started snapping pictures and you leisurely put your arm around your dad's neck. You are so cute!! Thanks.

Love,

Mom

Ethan Adams

Yes, I know it sounds like Ethan Allen, but no it tis our newest great nephew. Mr. Ethan Adams. He was born on January 25th and is SUPER cute!!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Hey Common Knowledge - - Waz Up???

Nana said to #4, "Hey Ava your pink skirt is cute and you look so pretty."

Ava (like duh), "Yes, I know I am."

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

The Captain and His Man

Note to self:
Nathan and Rand were besties when he made the trek to the United States. They were / are a match made in heaven. They went from door to door selling fictitious products and cashing in on their poor neighbors ignorance. They still have fun doing trivial innocent activities. I hear the two of them laughing uncontrollably whenever I encounter them at that table recording random things. Rand is one of the funniest humans I have been exposed to (beside Nate Dogg). He just started a blog and I can't wait to see what he writes. Don't forget to check out his blog - freshbutnoteasy.blogspot.com

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Who Knew Poop can disable a superhero

The Captain and I are about to run to Home Depot when #4 comes in and asks if she can come with. The following is our conversation:

Me, "Ava, run and grab some undies so we can go in the car."

#4, "Mom, I can not go fast right now. I can only go slow, I have to go poopy and they have stolen all my powers. Come look."

You run back and forth in front of a mirror that was sitting on the floor.

#4, "See, I can only go slow now. All of my powers are gone."

Disneyland

We headed out to Anaheim last week. We made a quick stop in Palm Springs the day before Disneyland. I must say that I enjoyed it. We were both pleasantly surprised with P.S. Super hip restaurants, a cute crowd, fun activities.

We made the trip with all of you, Little Nathan, and Kim, Dave and the kids. We stayed at a little hotel in P.S. that I would say was.....................a little run down. Kim offended the front desk staff when asking them if they "had any rooms that were cleaner - or bigger?" Awesome.

Turns out one of the largest storm to hit in years decided to make an appearance while we were at Disneyland. The first day we were there it started to rain around 3pm. It wasn't too crazy. The next day , ARE YOU KIDDING ME, it was hurricane weather. IT WAS NUTS. Thank heavens we were staying at the California Grande so we could go straight into the park from the hotel. It was a really cool hotel and if I ever decide to take ya'all back it is our destination of choice. We would try to go out in it and get super soaked. It cleared up around 4pm and we hustled out to get some time in. #1, Little Nathan, #2, and I tried out California Screaming. I LOVED IT!!!!! Paige and I went on it 2 more times. I realized how much I have missed roller coasters. Yippee I have a roller coaster addiction and I am going to embrace it.
Hanging out in the room while it POURED outside.
Check out Anthony grabbing your hand #4. This is the most perfect picture - EVERYONE is posing.
You ran up and grabbed Pluto's hand.
A little smile amidst a day of cold water.
This is the rained drenched look Kim and the kids are sporting. We were hiding out in Mickey's House while it poured outside. Suckers were the bribe of the day.

Monday, January 18, 2010

The Mentally Handicapped VS. The Emotionally Handicapped ROUND I...

So there is a worker at the body shop in Tempe that has the following ritual EVERYDAY:

1. He eats his packed lunch
2. He empties out his sandwich bag to be void of crumbs
3. He folds his sandwich bag into fourths and tucks it into a drawer

Uncle Danny watches this ritual with interest every lunch. He made a bike trip to Walmart the other night to purchase his "latest" necessities. The next day at lunch the Captain witnesses Uncle Danny giving this worker a box of 150 sandwich bags. (Guess what the worker did.)

He handed the box of bags back, got mad, and said, "Why would you give me those things. I don't have any use for them."

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME. A mentally handicapped person (who lives off of his disability check) uses some of his precious money to buy you an extra large box of baggies and you spit in his face? (Not literally spit, but it is rather Godfather horse head in the bed to me.)

Danny says to Nate on the car ride home, "He must have a hard time with charity."

The winner of this round - - - duh - - - the Mental tard. Please stay tuned for Danny's other adventures with the emotionally handicapped.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

The Dental Experiaaaance

So I had to go get some denti work done the other day. The Captain met me there to hold my hand (Ohhh, how super sweet...........wait until you hear what he did.) So, Dr. Morris took off my fake teeth (With a freaken drill and a really primitive tool?) he took them down to the nubbins I have for front teeth.

Let me interrupt this post to say that I looked like I was from Mississippi ya'all. Yes, I just bagged on the Miss crowd. Maybe I watch too many movies, but it just seems like if I am going to pick a state where tooth loss is prevalent it would be Mississippi. I wasn't born with my incisors and my front two teeth are shaved down to wee toothpicks. Maybe I should move to Miss if I get punched in the face and Dr. Morris can't put me back together again. I could rent out sheep (ok inside joke.)

Back to the teeth. So, I sat there with my mouth pried open, a drill was breaking off my fake teeth, and the Captain was taking pictures of my lack of fanciness. It was so bad I (who don't really give a crap what most think) can't show the pictures. My face was so swollen and my teeth were shaved down to umpa lumpas and your dad kept heckling the dentist. Remember how Dr. Morris lost the tips of four of his fingers? Well your dad kept asking him if was really a dentist since he didn't have full use of his digits. YES HE DID.

Did I mention that after my teeth were removed he took a mini blow torch to shape my gums. When I say shape I mean burn off. Awesome. Can't wait to show the pictures once I get the perm ones on!!!!! Whoot Whoot.

Monday, January 11, 2010

In My Pants???


Everyone was helping me make cookies the other day. One of you tried to put the powdered sugar away when accidentally tripping and spilling it EVERYWHERE. There was a clamoring for the floor with thy tongues. Giddiness like I've never seen was evident. Here is where I made an embarrassing mistake.

I start singing, "There's a party in my pants, So yummy, so yummy."

This is a song from Yo Gabba Gabba. Problem is that it should be , "There is a party in my tummy, so yummy, so yummy." BECAUSE IT RHYMES DUH!! I sang it several times before you corrected me. For all places for there to be a party, it should definitely not be in the pants. So sorry!!!

Friday, January 8, 2010

#4 - you just completed a number 2 on the potty and this is what you say,

#4, "Mom, I need some chocolate. I just went poopy on the potty."

Me, "Really, I don't think so."

#4, "Mom, this is your house and you just let me live here."

(Where did that come from???? First off I love that you translate chocolate with reward. Second, I am super happy that you realize that this is my house and you are just a tenant, but where do the two tie together in your wee brain. Is this just to butter me up? Hey mom look how smart I am, now please hand over the candy. I said it nicely. duh.)

#4, "I NEED some chocolate."

(You proceeded to go to the freezer and point to the dibs)

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

WEDDING

Tia Norma got married the day after Christmas. Your aunts and uncles gathered and had a great time. I have to admit the grooms toast made me a little nervous at first; and then he brought it around at the end and I shed a tear.

Below is one of my FAVORITE people EVER. Tia Allie. We had such a great time helping her arrange her floor plan. Honestly, I have never seen John so giddy. I believe he jumped onto the table at one point. It was super fun to be a part of.

Norma and her husband Eric. They left after the wedding to head up to Washington.

Monday, January 4, 2010

The incident

Tonight I made some wine soup. It was supposed to be beef burgandy. Something went wrong and it was really strong (It is like I am meant to rhyme and commit a poem crime. Silly yes, but Where the Sidewalk Ends is still one of my favs. Remember the one where the kid forgets to put on his pants. I read it everyday and yet it NEVER got old. I just laughed remembering it. )

Anyway we are all sitting around the table drinking our dinner when I notice that #3, you are not breathing. You are choking. You can't get the food out. I, SUPERMOM, saved your life. I performed the act of getting the piece of meat to fly from thy boca....... with superiority. It took a good 5 thrusts to get you to project the food. I calmly stated, "Nathan help me." over and over again. The steak was on the floor a matter of 3 sec when Chica (your dog) swooped in and ate it. That was the first time in those 20 seconds that anyone made a peep. There was a collective "GROSS!!!!"

#3 I was so impressed with your "universal sign for choking" hands. I know it was scary, but darling you did great!! Thanks for being so awesome.


Saturday, January 2, 2010

Having the best time on vacation ya'all. Hope you are having a super time with Alec. Your dad was so awesome the other night........ he was freaken break dancing. Yes, I have proof. I will download the pics when I get home. Can I say that he THREW himself on the floor to do the worm not one................but TWO TIMES. Age came into play though and he slammed his chin on the wood floor. He doesn't seem to have broken anything - fingers crossed.

I just happened to run into Gerrard Butler and Paris Hilton. Gerrard was uber cool and chatted with us for a minute. (I didn't do the talking - our friends did. I was just ok with staring at his face. It is rather pretty. (your dad didn't think so)

Paris' Hilton on the other hand was quite humorous. She purchased celebrity magazines at the convenience store. SERIOUSLY. If I were some fancy famous person I would have a someone on the payroll that would purchase the magazines that had me on the front (just a thought). It is not like she is inconspicuous or anything with a large white furry dead animal on her head. (Did I mention Large - the opposite of small? Did I also mention that it was white and furry. I love me some fur you know, but it was so puffy that it looked like the Easter Bunny was sitting on her head keeping her company............. This actually would be quite lovely. She could be like, "Mr. Easter Bun (for short) Do you think these blue moon boots make my feet look elfish?" and he would be all, "Oh Paris honey, you could wear anything and you would look so beautiful." and she would be like, "Oh bunbun. You are so right." And when she has some food stuck in her teeth he could reach down and pick it out. Maybe she could rub his foot when in a predicament? The best benefit would be that he could poop some chocolate candy on a whim.)